Dad brought us out again today. My dad was suppose to bring me go book hunting today but I didn't feel like it. Plus I don't want to end up buying the wrong book and waste my dad's money. Oh, went to get breakfast and guess what? The principal was there, with his wife. My mom and dad were nagging my sis and I to walk over and say HI. Whaaat? No mom and dad, you do not simply say hi to the principal. To be honest, I didn't want to greet him because I was kind of afraid of him. He just blew the little self esteem I had left that day when he indirectly insulted me. (He called me fat. Thanks.) Fine. It's alright. I didn't tell my parents about it because I had no reason to. I mean, what are they going to say? How should they react? So it's better if I kept it to myself.

My mom's making lasagna and I can hear the sizzling of the beef already, the smell is making me hungry but I am not going to move from my seat. I need to aroma to keep my brain working. About getting homework done, *laughs* I'm not even close. There is still a lot to do and there is still a lot time. I'm blogging everyday aren't I? See what the holidays does to me. I promised to finish at least half of my homework this week but I don't think that's going to happen. I'm probably going to rush everything in the last minute. Not that it's my first time.

I really need help, how do I write the sipnosis/opinion essay thingy. I don't know how to start so I'm drafting everything I concluded, all I need now is for someone to teach me how to insert the freaking words on to that piece of paper.


I'm going to go do something productive nao.
like:
1.go on facebook.
2. find someone to talk to.
3. disturb tk.

2 weeks of rest.

2 weeks of nothing to do besides homework. 

2 weeks of boredom. 

2 weeks of procrastinating.

No. Don't get me wrong. I'm not complaining. I just feel really absent-minded during holidays, they make me stupid. Holidays gives my brain a reason to relax and they stop working completely. I need to do something productive this holiday, I don't want to waste these 14 days with nothing. I'm thinking about studying but PFFT who am I kidding? It's the holidays friend, you're at home studying your arse off? Wait. That's what smart people do right? That's it. Adding that shit into my list. 

I have a list of things to do right in my diary right now and I'm trying to get most of them done by this week. I need to chill out and find tuition teachers next week. I still need to convince mom and dad to let me take up 3 tuition classes this time. I really want to ace this thing. My cousins came by last night while I was skyping Siaw and one of my cousin started asking me about school. 

cousin: Sshool started?

me: yeah.

cousin: sooo how is it?

me: *shakes head & weak smile*

cousin: you still planning on becoming a teacher?

me: urm. no. not really. I mean I might do civil engineering.

cousin: *eyes widen* good good. 

me: *nods*

cousin: yeah find something with more job chances.

me: okay. *smiles*

cousin: *smiles and left kitchen*

Yes, I translated that. We were speaking in mixed languages. I don't really talk much to this cousin. Yes, I turn into badminton girlfriend when I talk to cousins I'm not familiar with. You know the part where she said 'you still planning on becoming a teacher meh?' made me think. She sounded like 'you can do better than teacher, it would be a waste bah' Well, that's my opinion and I don't know her true intentions. I mean I would be flattered if that's what she really meant. Besides, I don't really feel like becoming a teacher anymore. I remember getting into a fight with my mom just because she wouldn't let me apply for maktab perguruan, damn I should have just listened to her and shut up. Remember guys, MOTHERS KNOWS BEST. Listen to you mother like how I listened to mine. Thank you mom, you opened up my eyes to see that there more to me than just that. It doesn't change the fact that she wants me to become a teacher though, I told her that was going to be my second option. 

Don't worry about not finding what you want when you're 16/17/18(heck whatever age), try finding yourself first. Don't push it. Things that are meant to happen will happen, all you need to do is wait. Some might have to wait longer but that just means you get to learn from more mistakes. Experiences makes you ten times the person you were. I promise. If you ask me, I'm still not sure about what I really want. I'm just setting myself a goal just to give me a reason to work harder. 

Oh, I went to ZENQ just now and went to have lunch at Kepayan. (We were suppose to have lunch first I know.) I saw Ellen, she was working in one the restaurants there. I walked over just to greet her and she was half hugging me in the middle of the place. She pushed my chin up just to examine the rashes on my neck, we laughed. 

Let it be a productive holiday yes?

NGAI so nice oh this picture.

Friday, 25 MAY 2012

Arriving in school with my huge bags( yes HUGE ) and gifts that mom made me give the teachers she thinks I adore. There are a lot of teachers that I am very fond of but no, I can't possibly tend to every one of them. After putting my bag down after humiliating myself on the way to class (my mom wouldn't send me in and my bag was freaking heavy lah, I blame my sister because she told my mom that big cars cannot drive through the small parking there. NGAI), I went outside and Ilyas greeted me Good Morning. Woah, I made an improvement, I actually have new friends now!( I have to thank the Upper 6 for bringing all of us together, we had 'bonding' time and it gave us a reason to talk to each other without feeling awkward.) Everyone else arrived including Judith, I must thank you darling because if it wasn't for you. I'D BE SLEEPING ON THE FLOOR. Everyone else left pretty early to the dewan to help out and I was busy looking for my two favorite teachers(that's what my mom said.) Okay lah, skip this boring shit here.
We were asked to stand in a row trailing the red carpet to greet the guests and teachers who arrived, Cikgu Joakim tripped but didn't fall and I laughed at him. I'm sorry but it was just really funny bah. The VIPs finally arrived and everyone started clapping like crazy.(We were already clapping like crazy even before we were told to.) Got back to our seat where it was super hot and I could feel my body melting. We really need air conditioners in the dewan lah. The performances were okay I guess, it was humorous so I give it a 8 out of 10. I didn't get to see Cikgu Bestah's performance though because I had to be else where when it happened. *disappointed* I should have been there but nope I had to volunteer for the part. ( Never mind. I get marks for it so I guess it's okay. )
When it all ended, everyone left and teacher get to have a Jamuan IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CANTEEN while we(students) get to watch them stuff their faces. Great. Skipping the part where we went upstairs and changed into our PJs (which I shouldn't have but no matter, I'm glad I did.) and having Cikgu Neoh yelling at us  making us assemble in the basketball court. Gosh the teachers in charge of the registration were late, Cikgu Jagan went all 'who's in charge here? where is the teacher? what happened here? why are there two tables?' OMG. I don't know anything okay? The teachers didn't even tell us anything about managing the registration and I can tell Cikgu Neoh was pretty much stressed out about the time delay. Being the AJK serbaguna I was(all of us URUSETIAs were serbaguna.) I helped out at the registration section until it was time to have lunch.
The Principal insulted me. He called me fat. Well not directly in my face but I am pretty sure that's what he meant. Never mind. I know my place. 
Being dragged as the MC for the PC ceramah and I screwed up. (I'm not going to talk about this, it's just too embarrassing. I am a disgrace, to the school.) At the same time, Adriel was trying his best to annoy me and believe it or not, he did it. I really wanted to shove my shoe into his mouth. (No offense Adriel but you were pissing me off.)
When I'm not working, I usually
1. GOSSIP with our group of URUSETIAS. (we practically have a table for ourselves already.)
2. TALK to Teekay.
3. STARE at random objects.
4. HAM other people.
Yes that's pretty much what we do when we're not running around taking orders from teachers and if you ask me, I think I've only done 60% of the things I'm supposed to do. It's pretty relaxing compared to the participants. Remember, we didn't have to pay this and we get marks for it too.
PS- Ah Tai went home because he was sick so one guy down, we only have 2 left.
Took a bath(the 6 of us, not alone.) when everyone else was in the DEWAN, it was raining and the wind was blowing like crazy, it was refreshing. Nothing much happened after that and we went to bed at midnight. 

Saturday, 26 MAY 2012
Woke up at 4AM, nudged Siaw to wake up but she was having a hard time too. (She said I snored oh wtf.) I'm pretty sure it was just me breathing heavily because my boobs was facing the floor(yes I slept on my boobs because it was the only comfortable position I could find.) Don't worry I'm used to it, my boobs have multi-purposes so it can also acts as a cushion. The day started off okay, we had to run  laps from the basketball court to the dewan and of course, I cheated. My boobs were too heavy, I'm sorry. Breakfast ended and activities were ready to commence. Wait, Cikgu Noreta she called out for us female usursetias, apparently someone forgot to dispose of her pad and we were part of the suspects. (I didn't do it. I swear. I wasn't even on my period.)
Aktiviti: Latihan Lasak
 Followed Cikgu Gregory to his station, station 2 the place where Pole Climbing will be held. He made Siaw and I carry this huge umbrella just so that the teachers can all stay under the shade, well I don't blame them, it was really hot and I was sweating buckets. Carried umbrella all the way up to the back of the Padang and Gregory requested for his whistle on his table, ran all the way to the Teacher's office and grab his whistle so that I could get back on site as fast as I could. the umbrella was set up and the pole was ready so all we need to do is wait for the participants, oh wait no, the teachers wanted chairs so okay. WE can go get chairs (there were only two teachers at the time, so Siaw and I decided to get four chairs so that we would also get to sit and watch the participants climb up that stupid pole I wasn't able to.) 
As I was saying, we went to get chairs and when we got back, there were 3 teachers so Siaw(so very nice) gave her chair to the teacher while I sit LIKE A BOSS beside her. Then there was 5 teachers, then there was 6. Fine, have my chair, I'll just stand. I can do it. Teams started showing up and the teachers have the weirdest request, making them sing Sayang Kinabalu while dancing or whatever. One that really made me laugh is this group being asked to sing Tanak Kampung with Chinese slang(the teacher even recorded it down, probably for fun but I just couldn't stop laughing. They were just awesome. You guys should have seen it. Siaw, I know you laughed too, it was just too hilarious.) Nothing much happened afterwards except that the teachers(Cikgu Abbal and Cikgu Greg) trying to make me climb up the damn pole, Hello I'm FAT, I can't climb up that thing and plus I am afraid of humiliating myself so you just cannot make me do it. the teachers said that I might not be able to satisfy myself if I don't get to the top and that I would go back there at midnight just to climb that damn pole. OMG no, I am afraid of the dark.
Aktiviti: TEA TIME
Yes, they have tea time in camp, they get to eat donuts and tau sa BAO while we watch them LOL. (we get to eat also lah but by the time they all finish, there weren't any donuts left already.) Enough of this, let's get to the best parts.
Aktiviti: Treasure Hunt
Treasure hunt, I forgot to mention that there are four teams: BLUE RED YELLOW GREEN.
Every team members are tied to each other and the rules are pretty easy, you cannot break that bond, if you do then it'll be troublesome for the whole team. The kids tried their best and none of them broke the strings, this time I am paired up with Jeck. (She is super nice and she's a new student from Keningau, she's just great, she laughs at my jokes! I love people who laughs at my jokes.) We were on PC duties and there were 9 check points this time, we only have 2 PC teams at that time, we had to walk all around school just to cover all the grounds. We walked and walked and walked and walked and WTF no one was getting hurt so we decided to take our job easy and joined the Ellen, Belinda & Ai San since they were the urusetias in charged of the check points. We made them sing K-pop songs if they wanted to be handed the next clue, Ellen made one of the teams do a crab walk( which was super funny. I just couldn't. Yes. I LAUGHED a lot in this camp so it's safe to say that I did NOT regret joining.) I think the GREEN team won this one. (YES)
Aktiviti: LUNCH
As usual, we let the participants fill their tummies first. Lunch was settled and it was almost time for the next activity on the schedule. TK needed someone to retrieve the rope from the previous station, I volunteered and so we went to find the damn rope. The doors were locked and the boys(some of the PA system boys) had to climb in just to get the stinking ROPE. We had a little battle and...- urm so apparently Tk hurt his palm and suspect that he might get AIDs because of it. (Sorry but I don't think the rope made love with another ROPE) Got him treatment from  Cikgu Claire (who I mistaken to be Cikgu Vera) I'm sorry but I really forgot and  I made her picked the little wooden bit out of his palm.
Aktiviti: SUKANEKA.
Meh, it was alright. I didn't really enjoy this one very much until the time for TUG OF WAR began. I was cheering for everyone I found attractive and yes apparently Johan is attractive. I probably destroyed my throat just by cheering them on. I was really disappointed when the teachers wouldn't participate in the URUSETIAS VS GURUS challenge from us but well whatever. We had fun figuring out the possibilities if we did get the chance to. The teachers ordered us to keep the rope so once again T and I decided to humiliate myself in front of the kids but then we got yelled at by Jaggil so we proceeded with what we were originally ordered to when Hartono decided to join us and grabbed the ROPE. Before we know it, it was TUG OF  WAR between HARTONO TK ADRIEL & 10 GIRLS. So yeah you do the math.

I'm not going to talk about dinner or anything because I was in a horrible mood after that, I was sleepy. I'm going to skip the MALAM KEBUDAYAAN and everything else that happened after that. Well, we did gossip(if that's what you wanted to know.) Slept at 12 or maybe even later, I decided to ditch my bra so that I could sleep better that night and guess what I did. (not mention how Siaw HAM my boobs.)

Sunday, 27 MAY 2012
did the usual stuff and helped teacher set up for the penutupan, wasn't needed at the scene so I chilled out with Jeck and T in the canteen. Being the hardworking girl that she is, she was cutting news papers out for her PA homework while T and I babysit Albright. I don't really want to talk about this scene so I leave this to Mr Tam, yes do let your imagination run wild. All I can say is I'm going to miss the camp, I mean it's not the best place to live but it's definitely the best place to create bonds and make more friends and also to stalk boys I find attractive. Nothing interesting happened after I got home, just that I missed my dad and brother really much. Albright reminds me of my brother and I'm pretty sure a lot of you can relate.

I'm really sorry I don't have picture, we weren't allowed to bring our phones so I didn't.

Monday, 28 MAY 2012
DISASTER.

I'll be attending the school Perdana Camp as an 'URUSETIA' this year.

It's my first year having to camp out in School so everything is still kind of new to me. Well, at least I am familiar with the school grounds and this way I won't get lost easily and I know where to go and where NOT to. I'm not trying to make things scarier for me or anyone else but yes. I believe that SPIRITS do exist, they are not ghost but spirits, I believe in them because ASDFGHJKLSDFGHJK you don't really want to know.
I'll be back Sunday afternoon and in the meanwhile I will be in school where I won't have any gadgets with me. Yes, no phone. No freaking phone. No laptop. Okay. Whatever. It's just for two- wait three days.

I mention joining this camp as an URUSETIA right? I don't really remember how I signed up for this whole thing but I'm pretty sure Hong Hong has 70% part of it, I did regret right afterwards but what the hell? I couldn't possibly make the teacher cancel my name out so I might as well enjoy what I got myself into. I'm sure it's going to be fun. (I hope lah. PLEASE.)

People joining for the camp as urusetia were categorized into groups. Unfortunately, Siaw is in a different group, she has to be there when the campers are to be registered. Fortunately, I have a lot of people I know in my group including this certain someone who just can't seem to get his mouth shut. My group, we handle the urm how do you say this ah? Well, we handle everything that has to do with FOOD. It means we are really important., people might die of starvation if we don't do our jobs. The teacher in charge told us that the urusetias are required to be up early 3AM just to prepare stuff for breakfast.
3AM? are you kidding me? I have trouble waking up at 7AM and now I have to get up 4 hours earlier.
Well the only solution in to NOT sleep. I WILL keep everyone awake so that I won't be alone at night, I get awfully scared when I sleep in a new environment. I usually sleep cuddled to my sister. (okay. no, this is not gross. it just shows how much we care for each other.) Which reminds me, my sister is going to have to sleep alone in my horrible pig sty, well 90% of the mess is made by her so NO, I'm not even sorry.

All I want from this camp is endless fun. I know what you're thinking. 'What? You are the damn urusetias wor? How are you going to have fun oh?' WELL, my answer to this is. I do not know. I just hope that things will turned out way better than my expectations because, I want this school camp to surprise me and make me regret not joining as a peserta all those years while I was still a junior. (Well, I'm still a junior lah but I'm considered pretty old now coz I'm TURNING 18 really soon.

Okay, I have random things that I remembered from today.
1. Hong Hong will do anything just to get information. I dared to go hug his cousin Yung Yung and he actually did it in front of everyone. I couldn't stop laughing, all I could manage was 'POOR YUNG YUNG.' (alright, I have got to stop calling him that, it's not how I should address a fellow student I have yet know.) But seriously, his face, omg you should have seen it. He was shocked but he was laughing at the same time and TK sheesh wtf I was just joking. You didn't have to be so rough that you pulled him into a massive bear hug?
2. I like boys.
3. Mike Bin is afraid of balloons. (which I think is a lie.)
4. I love The Avengers.
5. People think ill of me because I am perverted. (going to have to change this, I can't possibly make new friends when they already how much of a bad influence I am. From now on, I will only show my true colors to the FIFITs. No other people and well except for others who are exceptionally close.)

I wonder how many of you still keep track of my blog? I'm just curious bah because things I usually blog about is crap. I think I'm going to remove my tumblr link from this place. It has become unintentionally convenient for others and I'm not liking it.

MARIE. HUANG. PAE YII. I miss you guys already.
Today I pass by Huang's house and I remember always picking him up. NGAI.
Today I pass by Pae Yii's place and I remember how I used to send her home after account tuition after school last year. NGAI
MARIE. I miss you oh NGAI. Now I don't have anyone else to bully oh because Shnwei always hits me back painfully whenever  I try to 'ham' her.
I think we need a FIFIT group on facebook.
Okay. Childish much?

See you Sunday afternoon/night?

                   
Robert? What are you looking at? (I knew it. They want each other. REAL BAD. Your argument is invalid. Don't even bother trying.)

Okay. Okay. I'm leaving now. See you bbys <3

Arrogance. The state or quality of being arrogant; overbearing pride. 

Am I arrogant? I don't know but I don't want to be. I don't want people thinking that I'm too good for them. 
Wait maybe I am the one who's driving them away, maybe I am the one being arrogant that people especially new people find it hard to approach me. I don't even know if I'm being arrogant or not? What is like being arrogant? 
I just don't want people finding me arrogant. Almost 90% of the students in my class are smarter than me, I have no right to be an arrogant bitch. UGH. This post has been stupid. Very stupid.

when is it my turn? perhaps maybe after I end this horrible high school year.
The fact that there still aren't any reference available yet annoys me.
Hello? Seriously, if you want to change the whole syllabus then prepare the materials first next time?
You have any idea how much I need those reference right now. I don't want to randomly pick out a book because WHAT IF I got the wrong one. I would be wasting my parent's money and I'm not even a good enough student.
I hope the books would hurry up and market themselves. I NEED YOU GUYS.
So hurry up and take my money you bunch of tree killers!

Today was okay, first day in class so I thought I would wake up early so that I'd get a satisfying seat. Got to school and FISH people the door was locked. Whatever we could wait.
Smart people coming up the stairs... It's alright. I'll get my seat.
MOAR smart people accumulating in front of classroom door... GET OUT OFF MY WAY.
I stood in front of the door which was very rude but NU-UH I couldn't care less because I needed those seats.
The door opened and rushed inside, pulled every table and chair possible and settle down as quick as possible.
Poor new kids lah, I feel like we were bullying them but well people. This is what you guys call
'SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST'

    

This, is obviously not true. Right?